This is being the beginning of the wonderful
new year that we are all hoping it will be, and it is funny that at the beginning
of a year we all hope that this year will be better than the next. Less drama,
less problems, better financial and/business success and a dozen other things
that we hope will be better, in all cases; more of what we feel is lacking and
less of what we don’t want.
We all, at the beginning of the year have
NEW YEAR’S Resolutions, these are not always so new, usually carried over from
not just the previous year but probably many years over, with a few truly new
ones added on for good measure. And of course this year we SWEAR, this year will
be the year that we do it or follow through with it. Usually, fat chance of
that happening but none-the-less we tell ourselves we will and because social
networks are such a great way of documenting our every though (yes I know that’s
what I am doing right now) we post these resolutions on Facebook, Twitter,
Myspace or where ever and everywhere we deem necessary to convince ourselves, that this year will be different. On
top of these resolutions what is now appearing more often and regularly, are REASONS WHY NOT TO BE MARRIED BEFORE 23, 26, 30
or ever, or things to do before you decide to marry. Most of these articles are
completely ridiculous and utterly self-centred and screams, to me at least,
IDIOT.
What is the purpose of these articles
really?
Are these articles saying you’re an idiot
to want to get married before 25 or at all?
Look at what you’re missing out on if you
get married?
Here are some gems that I came across:
Some of course do have valid points, like not getting married just because it’s the next step, or
hoping your partner will settle down and become a more stable or reliable
person.
Fine
those I can agree with but when some one says that marriage is a crutch, its easier to be
able to hide behind someone so that you don’t have to go through life alone and
deal with things on your own, is actually, in my view a stupid thing to say. It sounds more like an
argument for marriage than against it.
Then
there are the arguments that marriage is Society's way of controlling you and
that there are disadvantages and costs to getting and being married. Well those
last two although valid still makes me want to smack the author upside the
head. There are disadvantages and costs to just about everything we do in life
so what exactly is the point to that argument. But then to quote Ghandi "Even if you are a minority of one, the truth is still
the truth."
So how does this agument valid the point exactly?
Then there
are things like
·
Be selfish
·
Finish a jar of Nutella on your own
·
Cut your hair
·
Cheat
This somehow does not sound any
better to me, just totally selfish and self-centred. Yes everyone is entitled
to their own opinion but that doesn't mean it has to be shoved down everyone
else’s throat, as i see it whether married or not somethings are just wrong.
I also agree that some people
have no business getting married and there are some 30 and 40 year olds one looks at and thinks their poor spouse…that person should never have gotten
married, not just 20 somthings. So fair enough, on those grounds, I give those opposed to the idea of marriage and relationships with a significant other their fair due, no
complaint.
The truth is marriage is not for
everyone, some times even never, sometimes, just not right now and there is nothing
wrong with that. I say these things should be discussed with your relevant
significant other to make sure what type of relationship it is that you want and if marriage is a prospect that you both want. As it is never
fair to let someone "hang-in-there" hoping it will happen or allow them to
believe that it will when it won’t.
No one out there does actually
have the right to tell you when you should get married or that you shouldn't, as
a matter of fact. Different people are ready for marriage at different times of
their lives and if some one is ready for marriage at the age of 22 or 25 or 50
is not for anyone to decide but themselves.
You should of course know what
marriage is about and what it entails, as essentially no relationship is always, literally, smooth sailing. Dating is just easier to get out of than a marriage
but who really wants to be alone for the rest of their lives. That’s not all
that much fun either, it is a great feeling to share things with not just
friends or your family but a significant other that has as much of a vested interest in you as you have in them.
And having a shoulder to lean on when your really need some one does wonders
for the heart and soul as well.
Life is about learning, laughter,
pain, sharing, growing as a person, loving totally and at times doing absolutely
NOTHING.
For me the whole point about
resolutions of any sort is about it being non-selfish.
·
Spend time with someone who is deeply important to you.
·
Help someone other than yourself in whatever way you can.
·
Instead of being selfish, sponsor a child.
·
Read a book you’ve always wanted to read or a classic and share it.
·
Appreciate all the moments whether good or bad
·
Listen to someone. Not just hear them but really listen
·
Give your time
·
Share a smile with someone
·
Be friendly
·
Love
·
Be honest
·
Get to know people
Hell eat that jar of Nutella
either by yourself or with someone special, as long as you’re living life. Life
is not just about yourself. It’s about others around you, that stranger on the
street, that person you know but not really, your best friends, family, and your
lover because at one time or another we all need someone, we all need people
and each other. That is what makes the world turn, it'a about the life we live
and who we live it with. It’s the people who’s lives we touch, the people who
love us and often especially that one special person who will remember us when
we die. That is the legacy we leave behind. The people we leave behind. 
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